Back in Bangkok. I love that city. Big, exhausty, loud, hot. It’s one of my favorite places. Again, Michelle emails a hilarious story about the Jim Thompson House. The House is on the tourist circuit. We went just like every western visitor who has set foot in Thailand before us. It’s a little strange going to gawk at the estate of a rich westerner. Look how successful we are. Rich and powerful, even in foreign countries. We made this country prosper. But in the end Jim Thompson disappeared walking in the beautiful Cameron Highlands. All that is left is a legacy and a few notable antiques.

Subject: Feel the Fear…and Laugh at Pee-Pee Anyway

Date: January 22, 2001

Hi there-

We’re back in Bangkok and went to the Jim Thompson House, as suggested, and took the tour from a woman who sounded like a Sleastack. While she was showing us the guest room, which contained an antique porcelain cat that held the urine of the “little boy, so he could carry it around”, the guide re-emphasized “you know Pee-Pee? Pott-ee? Ureene? (she pronounced it like that) She was clearly trying to get some kind of response from the glassy eyed tourists, who probably weren’t even listening. But I heard, loud and clear, and was of course stifling laughter at 1) the accent on the word “Ureene” 2) the emphasis on the pee-vessel and her need for someone to acknowledge the humor of the situation. So finally, I let out a teensy guffaw, half out of nervousness, and half out of pity for the poor woman and half to break the ice. Yes, that’s 3 halves. No one else laughs. The woman turns to me and says, in exactly the same voice, “you like?”

Then I’m thoroughly embarrassed. I’m sure I turned all red when everyone turned to look at the idiot who was laughing at the urine holder. Yes, people, I like urine. Ok, I think it’s funny. Pee and poo. It’s alllll fucking hilarious and the only reason why you don’t think so is because you are all a bunch of humorless morons who are afraid to laugh.

Of course, I did not say this, but only imagined saying it, as I was trying to stifle a laugh for the rest of the tour.

In other news, we are currently in Singapore and although it’s basically a big, clean, western city in Asia, I’m loving it. It reminds me of what a NYC theme park, brought to you by Disney, would be like. The food is amazing, and I bought a new shirt and a skirt, and went to Borders! Just getting prepared before we head off to Delhi…

Love Michelle